These words to a popular hymn kept playing in my head this morning as the church sang "The great I am." The lines from that song say, "There is no power in hell, nor any who can stand before the power and the presence of the great I am." It was bothering me that my brain kept wanting to say the scheme of man line. It bothered me so much that I had to immediately write a note about it to look it up later. If any of you were sitting next to me in church you might have noticed me frantically reaching for my phone and asking Erik for a pen while Pastor Terry was talking about communion. I couldn't help it. That strong urge I had to write was in me again. I haven't had that urge since the first and last post I made on this blog. At the time, I had every intention of writing on this blog often but I never felt the Holy Spirit push me to write since. Until this morning...
I came to church today weighed down by everything that has happened in my family since last June. Its been a difficult year. I have to admit that with each struggle I've fallen farther and farther from God's side. In the past, it has always been easiest for me to have a close relationship with God in the hard times. But this time was different. This time my struggles did not stem from my own bad choices, they were out of my control and it seemed like they were completely undeserving. "Why God?" I would ask myself. "What did I do to deserve this?" I never felt angry with God but I did start to lose faith in people and in good in general. Thus, my absence from this blog.
Today during worship, I was feeling very anxious. My stomach was in knots, my throat felt tight, I did not feel like singing. During one song I finally decided to ask God for his peace and immediately the anxiety left. I felt his presence again. It had been so long! And that is when that line kept repeating in my head, the wrong lyric to the song. I went home and googled it. It turns out its not a line from the bible but it is a line in the hymn, "In Christ Alone." Its one of my all time favorites!
The interesting thing is what I felt the Holy Spirit saying to me during worship was exactly what Pastor Terry said in his message a few moments later. I felt that it was important enough to share with everyone on this blog.
This is what God wanted me to hear in the song this morning, "There is no power in hell, nor any scheme of man that could take you from the power and the presence of the great I am!" As everyone else was signing the real words, this is what God was having me sing even as his peace was flowing through my body. And this is truth for you too! Romans 8:38 and 39 says, "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
How can we, that go through turmoil in life, attain that position of peace and joy? Ask for it! As soon as I asked God for his peace this morning he gave it to me. And as soon as he gave it to me he gave me the words to sing and put the scripture on my heart. And then Pastor Terry's sermon was all about staying in the Holy Spirit and repeating hymns and songs of praise. Wow! Talk about getting hit over the head with a brick! Yes I hear you God! And yes I'm writing it down just like you told me to.
I only hope that someone reads this and was touched as I was. I know life can be difficult. Chances are you, reader, are going through even more difficult things than I am. Perhaps they aren't even your fault. Perhaps you have done everything the way God would have wanted you to. Get angry, its ok. But in your anger, do not sin. No one can take you from God's peace and joy but you and you alone. Kind of feels good, doesn't it? Knowing that the choice is ours. I choose God. I may have my bad days or bad years, but I will not be moved.
Stay strong friend.
